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Monday, 10 December 2012

Until February…: Day Thirty one: Monday Blues, gift goddess...and Fit one takes on the Christmas tree giants

Soooo standard Monday morning for me fit one…Massively depressing! Positive is its only 9 working days till Christmas, negative is its still 9 working days till Christmas. Yes I was just in one of those moods today. It was made worse by my catastrophe making porridge session…it was so bad I had to abandon ship and have slightly stale toast,  couldn’t decide if it was seeds or mould but decided it was best not to think too much about it.  Went to get petrol…. They had run out of petrol…obviously they had because it’s Monday…yes I did still park the car up at the pump and lift the nozzle and attempt it anyway just to check…got shouted at….left petrol station quickly.

Diverted to get Petrol, got stuck in a massive traffic jam, desperately needed a wee so I had to start singing Spice Girls because that is the only thing that helps me in situations like this. A bit of spice up you your life whilst bopping in pain in your seat!
So the below is for Monday…..

Dear Monday,

I think we need to break up; I have been thinking about Tuesday all day and dreaming about Friday. It’s not you it’s me….

Please don’t bother me again,


Decided this Christmas I would become a homemade gift making goddess … Partly because I have no money and ….nope that’s the one and only reason.

So off I went armed with “designs” to craft shops at lunch time…You need training before you enter these shops!! I had no idea what most of it was for -how many types of paint, card (over 60 designs)and ribbons can one place hold... are you serious! Oh god I started to get nervous sweats and felt the pressure of seasoned craft home making people with their woollen cardigan’s and fancy neck scarfs stares! The end product was that I left with a massive array of things that don’t really go! I have spent the entire evening covered in paint, glue, glitter and stupid ribbons! It was never this hard on blue peter… if all else fails I’m making Tracey island!
I loved your email to the for this purpose unnamed shop about the Christmas tree you ordered me that they have since failed to deliver and are now saying its out of stock until further notice…..its reasons like this email that I love you so much, who else can make me laugh till my eyeliner and mascara turn me into Alice Cooper!

Dear (unnamed brand),

I cant not phone so this will have to be sorted through E-mail correspondence.

I brought the tree online off yourselves so please pull your finger out and resolve the issue!

Disgruntled regards

Mr S Garwood

Anywhoo I must go and attempt the second coating of paint… at this moment in time I’m literally watching paint dry so you are not missing much!
Today I mostly missed calling you to tell you how awful my day is and you saying something funny to make me smile, writing our Christmas cards together and you coming and closing this laptop down now and telling me I need to go to sleep.

Until Tomorrow – yours always, Zo x

1 comment:

  1. I laughed so much about your letter to Monday. Fantastic!